Listen Up Guys: It’s OK to Want to Be Liked

Listen up guys, it’s ok to want to be liked. The eternal debate about whether it is ok to want to be liked or not will always remain a popular and interesting subject of discussion. 

Let me quickly put up a disclaimer that wanting to be liked is not the same thing as needing to be liked. so, the Philisophiocal guys should sheath their swords.

Likeability is an acquired quality that helps appeal a person towards others, premising on understanding and appreciation. Nobody is born with it because it is not inherent. 

Remember it takes determination and hard work to store it up to your ability. 

Likeable people are often considered down-to-earth, open, authentic, interested, self-deprecating, trustworthy, and many other positive qualities. 

Usually, they’re warm and emotionally stable people that others want to be around.

Over the years, I’ve observed principles of likeability that I encourage everyone that comes on my way (most especially you) to practice.

For ease of understanding, let’s run through these eighth ways of becoming likeable :

1. Smile.

Great communication starts with your smile.

When you walk around, don’t keep your earbuds in and tap on your phone screen. 

Look up, take a few minutes to smile, and greet people you pass in public places. 

Say, “Hello, how’s it going? I trust you are doing well with your family and work!”

The kind of influence this has on people will surprise you because nobody does it anymore.

2. Look at people.

After smiling, eye contact is the following biggest principle of likeability. 

Don’t stare, and don’t look away into the distance while they’re talking. Learn to connect with the people you’re interacting with by looking them in the eye. 

That connection enables you to have influence and the ability to get things done as soon as possible.

3. Don’t be moody.

I’m not saying that you’ve got to be in a great mood all of the time but work hard to not let your issues control your interaction with other people.

 All of us are carrying around our bags full of venoms. That is to say, we all have our issues to contend with. 

We’re all wrestling with whatever we deal with on any given day. So, do your best to stay on an even keel and avoid being moody. 

4. Work on yourself.

Likeable people are usually big on personal improvement. They’re constantly trying to get better daily.

While certain aspects of our personalities stay with us forever, we’re either getting better or getting worse every single day. 

Whether it’s how you carry yourself, dress, think, talk and approach issues, or communicate with people around you—whatever—consistently improve yourself.

5. Don’t be judgmental.

When you’re sitting at home in your comfort zone and you don’t have to worry about your team’s morale, you can think and say what you like. 

However, when you’re within a team environment with a variety of people, you’ve got to leave your judgments and opinions by the door. 

People have more common ground than they do differences. 

Find the things you all agree on. 

Be somebody who can get along with people who have a completely different walk in life than you have. 

The easiest thing in the world is to divide people. 

It takes a natural leader to work with people who don’t think as you do.

6. Don’t be an attention hog.

When you’re part of a team, and particularly when you’re the person out in front, you’ve got to remember it’s about “we” not “me.” 

Your team has got to believe that you’re all in this together and that you’re not just trying to get another accolade.

 When people feel like you genuinely appreciate them, that you recognize their efforts, that you don’t put yourself above them, they will help you get things done easily.

7. Be quick to apologize.

This is one of the greatest ways, as Dale Carnegie would say, to win friends and influence people. 

When you’re in business, people get mad at you. Sometimes, people were upset at me about things I didn’t even know I’d done. 

What I learned to do was apologize right away. Diffuse the tension. 

It doesn’t matter if you were most at fault or not. Be the first person to put the grudge aside. 

I’ve watched someone hold a lifelong grudge that started when he argued with a guy about who should pay for a rental car back in 1980. Grudges are very rarely a matter of principle; they’re a matter of ego. 

Let it go. 

Be the person who makes problems go away, not the one who makes problems worse or compound them with illicit words or talk.

8.  Adapt yourself to the surroundings.

A person needs to adapt to his surroundings completely if he is looking for ways to be likeable. 

Building rapport is very important to create affinity and a sense of connection with the other person.

Empathize and be on the same wavelength so that you can create a positive atmosphere otherwise, the other person will think of you as fake. 

People gravitate towards individuals who smile, have positive body language, and know when to open up and when to listen.

I wish you a happy, healthy, and prosperous life and, more importantly, a happy New Year 2022.

Thank you.